The Planeswalking Tavern: Read All About It

This is a series of vignettes centred around a fictional Tavern in the Magic Multiverse.

 

THE printing mill was in full swing, operating like it had never operated before. Stacks and stacks of papers were being inked and stamped and cut and arranged accordingly so that they formed the periodical that was soon going to be shipped out to all exclusive members of The Planeswalking Tavern.

And overseeing the entire process were two men. Jéne E. Ilk you probably knew already. The other was a familiar face throughout The Planeswalking Tavern’s lifetime, but whose name has not yet been made regular in this series.

“I’m super excited,” Jéne E. said to his colleague, albeit in a manner that didn’t reveal the gravity of his words. “I just want to say, working with you has its ups and downs, but mostly ups.”

The other man nodded with a tiny smile, almost like communication through words was as foreign to him as the majority of the vast Multiverse.

“Rani, you’re awfully quiet today,” Jéne E. remarked. “What’s on your mind?”

Jéne confidant, Dhadama Rani, opened his mouth to speak, but any vocal sounds remained absent from his lips. He shook his head and tried again, but still no voice managed to push past his wall of anxiety. He pressed a hand to his chest and cleared his throat, after which he turned to Jéne E., causing his eyes to glow white and his face to calm itself as his muscles relaxed.

“Oh, boy….” Jéne E. remarked half-heartedly.

Rani, the shorter man, possessed by some sort of power or influence, uttered words that Jéne E. would remember for the rest of his life, words that weighted more than gold and were as pristine as Rani’s pure and innocent soul:

“I’m hungry.”

*                    *                    *

Both men found themselves in the dining hall of The Tavern, eating a hearty entrée and drinking pristine therapeutic water cultivated from a nearby natural spring. The men were too hungry and too excited to converse with one another, but as the meal gradually neared its end Jéne E. relaxed and sat back in his chair, observing the other diners in the hall and checking his list of duties on a magical notepad. As for Dhadama Rani, the man found himself with his eyes closed, listening to the light musical entertainment that wafted through the air scented with the smell of food and drink.

It was at this point that a third person walked into the hall, looked around, then found his targets and went up to the table shared by Jéne E and Rani. The master of The Tavern didn’t say anything as the third man spoke his greetings and then sat himself down. He wore a red and black mask that hid most of the features of his face, but his name was known far and wide in the planeswalking community.

“What are we having today?” the masked man said, studying the remnants of the meal Jéne E. and Rani had had. “Lamb? You didn’t save any for me?”

“Hello, Naga,” Jéne E. replied. “Didn’t expect to see you here today.”

“I heard something interesting was going to take place.” The masked man said this as he looked at The Tavern’s menu. “What’s the special today? Or should I have the regular? Genie, you look excited. What do I not know? And should I be scared?”

Jéne E. said nothing more than, “Oh, you’ll see.”

A waiter approached the table and offered something to Jéne, something consisting of pages of paper with headlines and titles in big letters. Naga took the opportunity to order his meal and dismissed the waiter before trying to figure out why Jéne E. had a massive grin on his face.

The elated man said, “Here. Have a look. Tell me what you think.”

“The Planeswalking Tavern has a periodical now?” Naga asked rhetorically. “Excellent. The Scorpions will be glad to hear about this. What’s that look supposed to mean?”

Jéne E. turned his eyes away. “No. It’s just that sometimes I wonder who’s the real man behind the mask. Sure you don’t want to take it off? We can front-page it in the next edition. ‘Naga Removes His Mask. All is Right With the World’.”

“That’s exactly why I keep the mask on. I’m not trying to win any popularity contests.”

“It was a joke.”

“I know. Dhadama, how have you been? You seem less crazy than usual.”

Dhadama Rani was playing an imaginary piano along the edge of the table when Naga said this. He calmed the noise of his illusionary instrument before answering with, “I like cookies. I like them good.”

Naga said, “I see. Well, good luck with the publication. Best wishes and all that stuff.”

Jéne E. answered, “Thanks, man. We have to get back to work. See you upstairs.”

The climb up to the second floor of The Planeswalking Tavern took longer than Rani had anticipated. Jéne E. kept stopping whenever a staff member walked by and kept giving them something extra to do. But Rani didn’t protest. It was a big day for The Tavern and everything should be as perfect as perfectly possible.

When they finally reached Jéne’s office, the master unlocked the door and led Rani into, shutting the panel after they had both entered. He went around his desk but didn’t sit down immediately. Rather, he pressed a button built into the table, causing a wall to retract to reveal a large canvas covered with words, diagrams, arrows, and pictures from a variety of sources.

“This year,” said Jéne E. to his companion, “this year, we will accomplish great things.”

>End of story.